Saturday, April 20, 2013

Hooray For Martial Law!

Why the fuck are you reading this? Northern Southern Korea is about to nuke us, didn't you hear?! And there's so much Casey Anthony and Jodi Arias coverage to catch up on! And there are turban-wearing terrorists hiding around every corner, just waiting to suicide bomb you back to the stoned-age! You should have been in your bomb shelters cowering in fear and shaking uncontrollably in puddles of your own urine in fevered anticipation of a terrorist attack well over a week ago!
Haven't you heard about Boston?! Where a 19 year old kid necessitated the entire shutdown of the city and 200,000+ law enforcement agents and military personnel performing warrant-less searches throughout multiple towns in and around Boston and Watertown?
 You wanna know what's 100 times scarier than someone bombing a marathon? Pictures like these....

I can't believe people are actually celebrating this Martial Law test run like some kind of moral victory.
"That's what you get for messing with Boston!"
"Terrorist, your game is through!" 

"Good for Boston! Might as well round up all the Sand-Niggers while we're at it and put them in camps! For our safety, of course."
Hey jackasses, I hate to break this to you, but the "terrorists" technically 'won' the second we shut down an entire city. And they continue to win every minute of unnecessary media footage.
noun:   the calculated use of violence (or threat of violence) against civilians in order to attain goals that are political or religious or ideological in nature; this is done through intimindation or coercion or instilling fear 


Because nothing says "We aren't scared of you!" quite like shutting down an entire city and sending in 200,000+ law enforcement agents and military personnel performing warrant-less searches throughout multiple towns...
Of course, I can't conclude this article without bringing up this gem of a meme....
That is one of the corniest, most counter-productive images I've ever seen. I almost have a harder time looking at that picture than I do looking at the picture of the dude who lost his legs. I'm a Masshole...I live a little over an hour away from Boston...I have family living in the bombing hit "close to home," I guess you could say. And despite being a proud resident of Massachusetts, this image made me cringe so hard I got an eyebrow cramp. I threw up into my mouth a little when I saw this on my Facebook news feed. Then it showed up another three dozen times to remind me of its existence.
"That'll show the terrorists who's boss! The corniest image on the entire internet! They'll be cowering in their turbans when they see this illustration of our city and the faces of four of our sports mascots majestically floating above the skyline, wearing smug facial expressions like some sort of disgruntled guardian angels. YOLO!"
Aren't the "Middle Eastern terrorists" who hate America and piss on our flag angry about just this sort of thing? Mindless consumerism and unnecessary kinsman-ship with corporate entities? Don't get me wrong, I'm not sympathizing with terrorists, because they're fucking hypocrites; they mindlessly consume hatred instead of brain-numbing entertainment.  And they form unnecessary kinsman-ship with dead peoples luggage instead of corporate entities. (And by dead peoples luggage, I'm talking about a dated religious doctrine they then use as an excuse to be gigantic assholes. Because, hey, if you're a murderous dickhead in this life, you'll be awarded with 72 virgins in the afterlife...or something like that. Fuck you.)
Terrorist hypocrisy aside, this image of Bostons Mascots is a photographic depiction of the exact behavior that acts as the figurative stick up these terrorists sandy assholes. (Aside from us invading their countries to mine their resources and replace their dictators with dictators of our own.) But I'm losing my train of thought here.
So while everyone is cheering along the Martial Law with chants of "USA! USA! USA!" they completely miss the fact CISPA was passed...
...and remain completely oblivious to the fact that the mainstream media is, AGAIN, playing on their heart strings like a god-damned fiddle.
There was also that explosion in Waco, Texas. You know, the explosion at the fertilizer plant owned by the company that incidentally was suing Monsanto. But seeing as how Monsanto themselves funded the drone strike that took the plant out, the Boston Marathon bombing proves a more 'profitable' topic for the mainstream media to focus on. That's a double-dose of distraction to keep blissfully blinded eyes from taking too much notice into what's going on in the House, namely, the passing of an internet bill that basically gives the government authority to watch you fap through your webcam.
 So let's give it up for this monumental week in history! We got Monsanto funding drone strikes on fertilizer plants...the passing of CISPA....and a test run of Martial Law in Boston and Watertown, Massachusetts! All the while, the indoctrinated masses cheer this bullshit on with chants of undeserved praise, their misplaced patriotism falling at the feet of what is, in all honesty, a long-dead country that was sold-out to the highest bidder(s) years before they were even born.
 Thank god for the 200,000+ soldiers and police that put there lives on the line to apprehend a single 19 year old kid! This wasn't an unnecessary display of power or anything. 200,000+ wasn't overreacting. Shutting down an area inhabited by roughly 7 million people isn't a victory for the terrorists or anything. It is completely out of the question to think this might have been a test-run for a potential collapse of society that would necessitate the government to enact an all-out totalitarian government to retain its control. Not like the country hasn't been on a downward spiral towards this for decades or anything like that.....

Nope, nothing alarming in this picture whatsoever. A militarized police officer sitting in a tank aiming a gun at a citizen isn't offensive in the least bit. That citizen deserved it for daring to take a picture from the window of their own home. Nothing to see here. Carry on. Shun the conspiracy theorists! How dare they ask questions, even on a rhetorical basis! How dare they think outside the box! It might pop our bubble of blissful ignorance.



  1. Cool story, this further proves they will never be able to take away all our guns, to many of us, to many guns, military wont turn on us. Boo hoo the govt is corrupt and liars we all know this.

    1. "Boo hoo" is a bit of an under-reaction to the constant raping of human rights and pillaging of the constitution. Forgive me for thinking it's ignorant to ignore, celebrate, or in your case, trivialize the BLATANT downward spiral of our country into a totalitarian state

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