Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Why Stop At Gay Marriage? Ban All Marriage

Why stop at gay marriage? They might as well just ban ALL marriage. It's an out-dated concept, at this point. Don't even bother getting married, people. Buy each other rings, invite both your families over, have a huge keg party that turns into a sloppy orgy...go buck wild. But there is no need to go and get the church or government involved.

Why would people want their relationship blessed by the government or church in the first place? Adding all these pointless, unnecessary endeavors to a relationship,
even getting complete strangers involved to sign papers and bring flowers and play music and fit tuxedos and.....fuck all that noise.
     "Hey, let's have a trivial ceremony to celebrate basic human instinct and the simplistic concept of mutual attraction!"  So two people have enough chemistry to like each others personalities (and genitals) enough to live together, have sex, and not want to kill each other? Good for them. That is the extent of how much I care about other peoples relationships. Whilst reflecting on two people who have decided to sleep with each other again after the initial bang, I have one of two opinions: "Good for them" or "I really hope they don't procreate."

It doesn't matter if it's two sticks, two holes, or a stick and a hole - who cares? No reason to hang banners, or send out invitations, or invite people from across the country. Just bang each others brains out and shut the fuck up about it. Bringing a relationship into the public domain in any fashion is unnecessary. If there is one benefit of marriage, it would be that once you attend the stupid fucking wedding maybe the couple will finally shut the fuck up about how happy and in-love they are. Keep that shit to yourself, assholes. Is nothing sacred enough to keep private anymore? Jesus fucking Christ.
While I think the entire concept of marriage is pointless, I know it isn't going to be abandoned any time soon, unfortunately. So if you ask me....and you probably won't....who the fuck cares if lesbians and homos want to tie  the knot? Here's an idea - if it bothers you or makes you feel uncomfortable, DON'T GO TO THE WEDDING. I know I won't be going. So you should probably do the same thing as me, and mind your own fucking business.

But again, I have literally no interest in 'gay marriage,' 'regular marriage,' 'marriage to an animal,' 'marriage to an inanimate object,' or whatever other form of marriage you can think of. So here's a bonus image of something far more relevant and important to society; something I think is far more important to debate than 'same sex marriage.'
The state of music.

Here, why not have yourself a second bonus too? Here's yet another image I made today that is weighing on my mind 1000% more than any 'Same Sex Marriage' debate ever will:

Merle's fate on the Walking Dead.


You went out an ass-kicker, Merle. If only it weren't for that asshole Ben getting in the way, you would have killed the Governor and most likely escaped back to the prison. But that wouldn't be a climatic penultimate episode Season 3, would it?

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