Friday, April 20, 2012

MDNA is a terrible album name

So Madonna released an album influenced by the recent surge in electronic musics popularity.....and she called it MDNA. Could she be any more obvious?




What a cunt. What a stupid fucking idiot whorebag. Just like when she made out with those putrid hellspawn her musical vagina haphazardly spewed out for Disney (Jamie Lynn Spears and Christina Aggs), Madonna remains in the spotlight well past her expiration date of relevance, simply for being an attention whore.

You wanna impress me, ladies? Try scissoring on stage. Pull that off.
I just brought up the album on Wikipedia for a quick glance at the track titles of this album. Actually listening to it would risk the loss of brain cells I'd much rather lose to psychoactive substances or music festivals. Plus, I figure it will most likely be riddled with a gratuitous amount of propaganda and occult worship, and at the very least, a whisper of necrophilia and pedophilia. (Just like "Thriller")

Girl Gone Wild
More like great grandmother gone senile. And what a clever and original title, you de-pluralized "Girl" from the existing entity "Girls Gone Wild." How creative! Then again, at least you're admitting, with this title, that at this late stage in your career you're doing little more than whoring yourself out for cash and fame, just like the supple young co-eds from "Girls Gone Wild" do when drunkenly flashing their perky tits. Only difference is, I would BRAG about banging those co-eds. I'd only casually converse about banging you.
 
Gang Bang
The devil-worshiping music industry is losing the last shreds of its subtlety, I see. Might as well have called it "Ritualistic Blood Orgy" and got it over with, Madonna. We all know you're part of the Illuminati, Tila Tequila said so!

I'm Addicted
Clearly yet another reference to drugs. But on a deeper level, perhaps it also alludes to addiction of shitty music, music that brain-washes thousands into lowering their standards. Lowering their standards to waste money on this musical diarrhea. Or wastes their time illegally downloading it. "I'm addicted....to wasting time listening to shitty, generic pop tracks!" I mean....actual minutes of these peoples lives are lost to this bland garbage, likely never to hear "The Odyssey" by Symphony X or "Heavy Horses" by Jethro Tull.

Turn Up the Radio
Fuck this. There is no need to continue after seeing the titles "I'm Addicted," "Gang Bang," and a direct rip-off of the 80's hair metal smash hit "Turn Up the Radio" as performed by the mediocre band Autograph.... (Pop music sounding like Autograph and Motley Crue, wailing guitar solos, wasn't necessarily a bad thing.)

This is clearly ALREADY a classy album, judging from these titles, and I think its fair to ascertain that in its duration it redefines the limits of music multiple times.
Mozart would get a fear erection if he listened to this.
Beethoven would gain back his hearing.
Chuck Norris would immediately start round-house kicking babies into running helicopter propellers, the blood and shredded baby guts showering the nearby pile of still alive, still alive, still crying infants, Chuck Norris's infinite baby-kicking stash.

Just kidding. This album is probably pure trash, and dollars to donuts it puts more holes in your brain than the actual drug MDMA she was alluding to does.
If you're not convinced at this point that at least SOME popular music is propaganda composed to intentionally dumb down, distract, and demoralize an already docile generation, you need to go check out some interesting websites and do some research.

Anyways, kudos to Deadmau5 for serving her something fierce already. Oh wait, he retracted his argument? God dammit. Its obvious the album is a reference to drug-use, its called "MDNA" and has a strong electronic influence. Her use of the word Molly at the Ultra Music Festival was a CHEAP POP, and another reference she personally made to drug use, no matter which way she spins it. And more importantly, people should just go listen to music worth a damn instead.
Even if she doesn't take the drugs herself, she is marketing using the implication of the drug in multiple, obvious ways, thus exploiting her fans with matters she has no experience with.


WHICH is arguably WORSE, because if she's so against drugs, she has absolutely zero context to make such content with. She isn't ripping gaggers of molly with her fans, she's using their addictions and crutches as a marketing mechanism to target weak-minded fools who have no taste.

Plus, is ILLEGAL drug use really the biggest issue we're facing as a planet? Does recreational drug use hold that much gravity, or should we maybe focus on something.....bigger?

Don't take drugs for fun, take them for health! Because in order for us to maintain this clusterfuck matrix of a society and the American dream gag running, we need to have you by the balls in nearly EVERY aspect of your life. Your spirituality. Your health. Your sanity. Your finances. Your ego. Your credit card number.

Everyone seems oblivious to the fact that the same fuckers hating on recreational use of the FUN drugs, are the same fuckers controlling every aspect of the legal drugs we're expected to get prescriptions for every time we scrape our knee or hit our funny bone. Ya know, the drugs that AREN'T fun.
These fuckers are both:
A) Supplying a large chunk of, distributing, and profiting off the illegal drugs...
and 

B) Peddling drugs of their own LEGALLY, even to children, seemingly 100% guilt and scrutiny free.

I admit, I have a sick sense of humor.
I make my jokes about Chuck Norris round-house kicking babies into helicopter propellers. But I'm not force-feeding kids pills to get them to act more docile, lifeless, and conformed in their PC-friendly kindergarten environment, am I? I don't carry around a bottle of Concerta and Ritalin at supermarkets, looking around for misbehaving children, and running up and force-feeding them pills. I'm not scouring schools, searching for any sort of creativity, so I can stifle the life out of it, in order to keep the illusion of sanity in a completely bi-polar, batshit insane universe alive for 10 more seconds as it lies dying, breathing heavily from the weight it must burden: all of the worlds collective ignorance and stupidity.

So who's worse here, me using words to paint a bigger picture or the assholes who tried to force feed me the meds so I wouldn't notice these things, this obvious bullshit we're all supposed to not only ignore, but embrace and endorse daily? If I was prescribed the ritalin or the xanax or whatever the fuck when I was back in middle school, would I be writing these words to you 12 stoned readers right now, all these years later?


Hell, I'll take those pills NOW. Now that I've discovered the bullshit of society, that there's no pot o' gold at the end of that rainbow, that the grass isn't greener in the other pipe. We're all living a lie about a joke, the punchline to which is death, which could either be nothingness, an eternal dream, or a reset button. That's it.

And know why I'll take those pills now? Because they won't hinder my education. Knowing that a big part of their development was to dull inquisitive minds, I won't ever rely on them as more than a quick, mundane escape from the mind-numbing stupidity that is being force-fed into our brains from every direction daily.

Well, every direction....but from the underground, where the collective talent of our species lies undiscovered, intentionally stifled and unfunded.
 

The underground is a place where shitty artists like Maddona get their ideas to try and remain lazily relevant and sell more records, instead of making any music worth a damn.

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